Uncategorized

Working..

Hey! Guys, so for the rest of December I will not be posting any blogs. I’m currently working  on something, that I think you all will like. Shutout to God for a clear vision.

Thank you all for being great supporters and following me for as long as you have! God Bless and Happy Holidays!

 

 

Chasteny Colbert2

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Faith

Stability.

I have never been stable, from childhood on up. I have never been stable.

Nine whole years of my life, I can stay I was STABLE. I stayed in one place for nine years.. but after moving here from California.. straight unsuitability I had a total of twelve addresses and attended four different high schools. I never had stable job history let alone a stable number.

Who wants to deal with that?

I felt as if I was a burden while staying with others, some welcomed me with arms wide open and I appreciated that. Yet, I Here I am, young with a child and I don’t have my own place to live. I was homeless for a total of four years! I appreciated everyone who took me and my child in, but it was nothing like having your own.

It’s hard to gain stability when you’ve been unstable for so long.. but here I can say I have lived in my own home for almost a year, I have stayed on my job going on a year. I have created a routine for my children that hasn’t changed. My son is familiar with his own home rather than someone else’s. Stability wasn’t only for me but for my children as well. Stability isn’t only for my home, but for my finances and spiritual stability.

God has given me my stability. My focus has to stay fixed on him. I look to him for direction rather than my own.

Psalm 16:8- “I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.”

I will not be shaken. I will not be moved! I am STABLE!

Uncategorized

Favored.

Favor- an act of kindness that is beyond what is due or usual.

 

I have been a witness to God’s favor. I’ve seen him work in numerous ways, that seemed so unreal, but I knew that God has always been  a way maker.

One thing I have learned about myself is that, I never try to put myself down in the dumps. Sometimes they way my life just sets its self up for me, literally stresses me out! Like im so ready to pull my hair out, But I never worry! The moment I feel myself giving up, I remember that I’m one of the chosen ones. I’m Gods favorite. I have ultimate FAVOR.

I get so excited when I talk about it.

Favor comes for expectancy. When you expect for things to go all wrong, chances are it will.. when you have your mind-set on positive things and positive outcomes, you have that much more relief. Staying  positive always is the best way.  Remind yourself that God always wants what’s best for his children.

Declare favor over everything! Your workplace, House, Car, your children, Your finances!

 

I have witnessed God’s favor with my loved ones, my friends and associates. Little things that I’ve seen him do!! It’s just a beautiful thing! It’s just amazing how God works and how he carries us. I can’t count how many times I have witnessed favor in my life but BOY! It’s something that I can hardly explain… when I figure it out I’ll definitely let you all know!!! I do know one thing is that the FAVOR and GRACE of God is all I got, and I’m oh so thankful! Lord thank you for my relationship with you. I am truly BLESSED.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Faith

Lemme pray for you.

 

Short and Sweet Blog Guys!

Have you ever thought about praying for that person you don’t care too much for?

Like seriously, instead of gossiping about them why haven’t you just took the time out to say a prayer for them?

GOSSIP and SLANDER…. it’s all just negative and draining and we have so much more to do with our time! Like drinking water, build are brands, and just flat-out minding your own.

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Recently, I’ve had some trouble at my workplace. Problems where my full potential is being unnoticed, im overlooked, and unseen. The emotions that I’ve been feeling here lately because of that has me on edge. I’m so upset; but my anger isn’t solving anything and my anger isn’t going to much me much money either. Although I want to step into that office and slam a pen down on the table and say “Hey! y’all got me messed up! I should knock your papers down!” I’m not going to do it.. Instead I rather pray about the situation, and continue to be a hard worker. I wont be overlooked for to long.

We have to remember that the issues they have with  us is far to big for us to carry!

You have to remember that it’s not your fault that God made you the way you are. You have a define purpose on your life and others won’t like it! They will feel intimated by it. So it’s so very important that you pray for her.. him..and them!

You have ultimate POWER on your life.

Pray against the enemy.
Stand your ground in victory!

God has your back when the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy.. now that’s just unpleasant.

We all have to remember not to get so worked up about things we cannot control and just pray about them. Giving out worries and confusion to God and allow him to work it out. We just have to continue to be positive and fulfil our destiny without letting OTHERS get in the way of that. It’s easier said than done but its a step that we have to take.

Psalm 25:2 I trust in you; do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me.”

 

Lifestyle

Choices.

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Life is all about choices.

Every choice that we make can impact us tremendously.

I’ve had many occasions were I had to make a choice, well I mean that’s like everyday.

How I raise my children, What they will wear, What I choose to feed them etc. Its a choice. I could choose to raise them one way and that would be my choice BUT I have to make sure that I’m thinking of the future rather than the present and the right now. What I instill in my children is lifetime, they may not grasp it all at once but eventually they will get it.

I made a choice to eliminate things that were no good for me, a red flag pops up and sometimes I hesitate just a little bit, unsure of the decision that I’m about to make. “Will be the right one?” So when my mind began to wonder, I try to look at the result of things.. if I stay here I know it wont be good, if I keep this going I know it’s not going to end well. Sometimes I will try to convince  myself that my decision is good one even when I know that it’s not.

 

My choice is to follow God and seek him in my decision making. NO! im not saying that every choice that I make I ask God about, but  somewhere in the back of this beautiful mind of mine, I know that God has been pleased with the choice that I’ve made. Seeking his presence on a choice gives you a total clear path. God gives us clarity, but we also have to use our own minds to know and understand that the choice we make will impact us!!

Life is all about choices people, and everyone has them. Make the best choice. Thinking before you ACT! Understand what the outcome of you choice will be, there are some scenarios were you wont know the outcome, but you kinda have to just take that chance and see what’s out there, and that’s where trusting and seeking God comes into play.

You made the choice to trust him!

Now follow.. and make that choice.

Everyone has a choice.

Lifestyle

Pshhh! Quiet.

Soooo, November is an approaching and the end of the year is on its way!

November is the 11th month and what I’ve discovered about the number 11 is that it means awakening and transition.

November is my wake up call month, my transition month to continue get myself in line.

Although I have had a pretty decent year and accomplished so many goals in this year.. November is going to be my QUIET month. Work STILL needs to be done, and I’m seeking Gods voice more than ever. . In this month I will be actively in prayer and caution of what I ask God for and what I ask him to reveal to me. Every word I speak and every move I make will matter! I’m preparing myself for the next chapter of my life.

“November is my month to hear from God.”

So I need my quiet time… no offense taken. I just need quiet time. I’m excited for my next level. I’m recieveing everything God has in store for with me wholeheartedly.

So, if it doesn’t involve my level up.

I will not put my energy into it.

November is my month of Silence.. 

 

 

 

 

Faith

Rest.

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So every week is a busy week for me, im literally on the GO from sunrise to sunset, I hardly get a chance to sleep in or enjoy an off day by actually being OFF.

I MEAN LIKE PHONE ON DND (do not disturb), kids out of the house, just peace and quiet time. Although I would love to just have everything stop and say “Okay , lets just get to this tomorrow.” It’s not that simple, I’m a mother for one and I have to use each day as a POWER MOVE, a productive day to get somethings done. When put off things it only puts me behind, which is quite aggravating. I think once im completely content in life and where I truly want to be. I can CHILL. Right now, im putting in some work.

Keeping myself busy and my time occupied.

BUT

Is that really how God wants us to function?

In this moment, I’m struggling to truly  Rest and Relax in God, Finding some BALANCE and utilizing my time wisely.

  • I keep myself busy, which is great but I don’t rest.
  • I have some source of balance but not really. I cause myself a lot of confusion, from there i’m literally alllll over the place.
  • I don’t utilize my time wisely. Time with God is number one and how much of that do I provide to him?

Although we want the work done, We have to REST.

You can take a day off, and allow God to work. He desires rest for us, because we are not capable of doing every little thing on our own. Sometimes we have to sit back and allow God to work his magic.  We have to take a grip of our overly busy lives, and handle them over to God. Just because you’ve decided to take a chill day does not mean the world will end and what’s needed to be handled wont get taken care of. Chilee REST its OKAY!

My Time, My Time.

I literally laugh at this. Its like enough hours in the day it seems like.

So with all the time that I’m using, none of it goes to God.

I DONT HAVE TIME FOR GOD.

I mean that’s how im making it seem , my overwhelming life seems to get in the way of my Fathers time. Selfish much? I think yes, because of the way I use my time, others seem to get annoyed with me, I can’t always hang out, go here, go there etc.

So what I’ve come to realize is that you need to find some BALANCE.

Balance out your time, for yourself and others. I get annoyed with others because I have horrible time management, and because it has nothing to truly do with them. I haven’t really found balance in it all.. Everything began to happen at once and I start to feel like im about go CRAZY! My emotions began to spiral out of control, so then again I have

NO BALANCE AND NO REST.

SO MY ATTENTION HAS BEEN CAUGHT.

Rest in god, Allow him to move and work in your favor. Ask the Holy Spirit for rest, balance, time utilization, and how to balance everything out smoothly. It seems like there isn’t enough time in the day but there is, you just have to find that balance.

Seek God and Direction, from there you will find balance and rest.

 

 

Personal

When In Doubt Write It Out.

2EEE192F-F186-4152-875C-979419A39236.pngHey Guys!

So today my blog wont be full of emotion but better yet just a little about me.

Why Do I Blog?

Okay, so I will make a long story short. One night I was up at like 4 a.m., I always wake up at this time, and when I do so I start praying and writing.  After I prayed, and finished up my journal entry, I began to scroll through Instagram. I came across an old classmate of mines page, and checked out her blog. I watched her style of writing and how I could hear her voice through her words. I thought of myself. She was open, she was real and most importantly she was herself. From that moment, I prayed on my decisions called a friend of mine and made the final decision to blog. She inspired me to write. She provided me with and inadequate amount of information, she didn’t withhold anything from me, because we are both different! I wasn’t copying her, I was inspired by her, what she talks about isn’t what I talk about. We both have different stories. Her story will never be mine and my story will never be hers.

As said im the Author of MY STORY.

I felt as if my voice alone wasn’t enough, I struggled with expressing myself and being open. I felt like I wasn’t myself, I struggled with my identity. I wasn’t comfortable with my identity. I allowed others to be my God and speak for me and think for me.

Yes! not being yourself is real!

How did I start?

So, I asked my series of questions and did my research. I spoke with my sister almost everyday, she educated me on how to be consistent with my blogs, post something at a certain time and stick with it, and have our photos done early. (Yeaaa my photos are never done on time) lol but hey I’m still working this out here. So I download WordPress and started from there, I used all of my notes from my phone and began to post. No I never went to school to write, and Yes! I’m amateur as everrrrrr, but it works for me, writing has become very theruapic for me, I literally have a peace of mind. It’s like my escape from the word. I’m expressing myself and that is like so REFRESHING!

But I say all of this because blogging has been my outlet, I feel that more people should write even if you don’t plan on sharing it with the public, write something to yourself.

Release those bottled up emotions!

I encourage you guys to get a journal, planner, cellphone what ever it is and express your thoughts! You let me know how you feel afterwards.

With Love, Chass

Self Love

Baggage Claim.

Emotional Baggage..

The things that we hold on to like past hurt, disappointments, betrayal, and lies all becomes apart of our baggage. Sometimes its quite embarrassing and it often affects are relationships. Who wants to deal with someone who has so much baggage?

 

Most Guys Run.

But what about the one who decides to stay? and help you through your emotional time? It’s not easy to get rid of the baggage that we carry, the baggage that has been on our back for so long, sometimes we just need that emotional support to let go.. We blame Chris for everything dirty Tyrone did, now Chris is stuck trying to fix a heart he didn’t break.. he has the choice to opt out and leave this broken girl alone. I just feel that it’s not fair to have someone clean up a mess they didn’t create…

So what about the guy who will stay?

If he stays, then are you willing to change? Now I know how hard it is to help someone through a past relationship. You don’t want them to be the exact thing that you’ve tried to get rid of, or you become that for them..

But I’m going to be simple and to the point.. Let go of your baggage. Its easier said than done, you have to be willing to take that extra step to make a relationship work. You heal my wounds I heal yours.

Become aware of the problem, Fix it before it goes to far! Let that person know to be patient with you BUT you have to work on changing! Aint nobody trying to be with the “Bag Lady” Badu said dudes go running lol you crowding his space sis! Fix it Jesus. lol

I am quailfied to speak on this. lol

Get YOU together most importantly. If you arent ready for the relationship thing because of your issues, get them togther. Who knows someone might be strong enough to help you with your emotions.

 

 

 

Lifestyle

Child support.

 

I learned something about myself.. I have daddy issues lol

Now, let me explain this..

My father is not a bad man, nor does he have bad intentions. I have never been angry with him because of circumstances and life turnouts.

I have over 20 brothers and sisters NO! I’m not exaggerating. Lol it was like I was meeting a different family member every other week.. and I still am!

I DID not really get to know my father until at least 4 years ago. Now, I’ve met him before.. but I never had a chance to actually build a relationship with him. So like any other young girl in the world without a father, im sure you all can assume that I endured ALOT of dysfunctional relationships and abandonment.

Because of this relationship, I have never had a stable relationship with a man let alone any relationship.. because I was so used to a man not being there or leaving it was nothing for me to cut someone off, and forget about it. Its like ill erase that part of me away and move on with my life. IM QUICK TO CUT A “bleep” OFF SO DON’T GET COMFORTABLE. you know what im sayin? *cardi b voice* haha.

  I’m quick to cut off and remove something out of my life because of abandonment.

How can you miss something that’s never been there? So that phrase began to speak to me.. a couple of nights ago my daughter was whining in her sleep. I began to pat her back, (I was dreaming) and I began to say “Why are you whining?” “You weren’t there.” “You barely even know your dad!” I kept saying this to her and maybe after 15 minutes I realized that my child was hungry  and she needed a bottle, but the strange thing about it was, why would I say something like that to her? maybe what I had experienced projected on to my daughter. It didn’t have anything to do with India it was about ME.

  I am her and she is me.

 

So I began to think, I’m doing this parenting thing on my OWN.. I did this BY MYSELF so why are you upset? No one showed up for me.. I DID this!

I was looking for emotional support. I needed that support.

 

So, with me saying that I was trying to comfort her, while trying to comfort myself. I was basically instiling into her that she has to be strong.. but the way it came out wasnt supportive nor soothing but more so angry.  My father wasn’t there when I experienced what I did. So I had to be strong on my own, like I always have. My abandonment has built my strength. I know it may sound strange but God knew what I’d go through from birth. I don’t look at what has happened as a bad thing but more so a learning experience, a character builder. Im not angry, and im not mad at him in a way I thank him. 

Some steps that im taking and working towards; 

Healing- It definitely takes time, but the outcome is so rewarding. “Im still kind of in my healing process”

Forgiving- This ties into the Healing, once you are healed you can start the forgiving process.

Stop the generational curse- I wont say that I have a curse on my life but abandonment has to be something that I’ve experienced the most. Not just with my father but with other relationships.

With all of this strength that I carry, I want to pass it on to my babies. I need them to be strong, adn understand that its okay, not to be okay. The things that we go through do not DEFINE us! Give your children the best support mentally.

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